When an individual decides to enter rehab, he or she is making a lifelong commitment to maintain sobriety. Once in rehab, substance abusers learn that recovery isn't a destination, but a life-long journey, one that they must learn to navigate to avoid the danger of a relapse.

The Relapse Process

The warning signs of a return to addiction can be better understood in the context of a relapse process, which usually begins inside the individual’s mind long before they actually relapse:

The Holiday Season Temptations

Christmas parties…New Year’s Eve parties…these are times for family and friends, for celebrating–and for recovering substance abusers, holiday temptations.

Non-stop Addiction Spanned for Decades

It was the first time in years that we had hope. It had been a rocky four weeks since my brother-in-law got out of jail on drug-related theft charges. And, for the first time, it was him who suggested that he needed help to combat a non-stop addiction that has now spanned decades.

He checked himself into a highly respected recovery center in New York. Cautiously, we were feeling optimistic; he seemingly was embracing the program and following a few weeks of treatment, they set him up in halfway house. It had strict rules, oversight, mandatory drug testing and of course, a zero tolerance policy regarding drug use. In addition to a warm bed and a safe room over his head, counselors worked with him to help find a skill he could apply to a steady job, or even better, a career.

Getting beyond the past

When a substance abuser first becomes sober, they can have a long list of grudges against those who have hurt them in the past. In order to get on with their life, it’s crucial for them to be able to let go of those grudges and offer forgiveness. If they are unwilling to forget about past wrongs, it may hold them back in recovery or even lead to relapse. Those who do manage to get beyond their past will usually find that it greatly benefits their new life.

Forgiveness is the process of ending the resentment, indignation, or anger that results from a perceived offence. Not only is it possible for an addict to offer forgiveness to other people, but it is also possible for them to forgive themselves for past bad behavior.

People who are trapped in addiction can suffer greatly. Their obsession with alcohol and drugs can lead to the destruction of everything they hold dear. It is usually obvious that their addictive behavior is the source of the misery, but the individual may still be unwilling to change. This is because there is comfort in familiarity and change takes a great deal of courage because it is a step into the unknown. it is vital that people summon up the necessary courage to move forward.

There is no doubt that entering recovery is a courageous move. Change is never easy – even when it means that people are leaving a miserable situation for a much better one. Embracing change during recovery takes courage, because recovery is a process and not an event. Becoming sober is just the first step; there will be plenty more challenges ahead.

Pushing against an immovable object is an exercise in frustration, and a big waste of time and energy. Yet for many of us, we do just that when we refuse to fully accept ourselves as we are, warts and all. There are just some things that have to be accepted for what they are. For example, a person may be born with a set of genes that could make them prone to certain diseases. There is nothing an individual can do about their genetic inheritance; all they can do is try to work with what they have. This is acceptance – the ability to effectively “be okay” with things beyond your control.

Self-acceptance can be defined as an unconditional affirmation or acceptance of self, in spite of weaknesses or deficiencies. True self-acceptance is attained when an individual is able to accept those realities, and does not feel the need to protest or change it. Self-acceptance is also liberating, since the individual who has truly accepted themselves has nothing to hide. At 12 Palms Recovery Center, we believe that In order to find happiness in recovery, it is important that an individual develops at least a certain degree of self-acceptance, because living a successful life is as much about recognizing individual limitations as it is about taking positive action. This philosophy allows individuals to focus on those areas where their efforts will be most fruitful.

You’ve done everything you can.  And, finally, you got the result you hoped for.  

Or so you thought.

Finally see a loved one make it to -- and through -- a rehab program can bring relief to many families.  But making it to rehab is not the end to the long road to addiction recovery.  Just the contrary, many times it is just the beginning.

What happens if it happens?

While rehab can lead to recovery, it is certainly not without struggle. Many recovered users experience a relapse during or after the addiction recovery process. That’s why it is important to understand that relapse is a process, not an event. In order to understand relapse prevention, you have to understand the stages of relapse. Relapse starts weeks or even months before the event of physical relapse.

Generally speaking, there are three stages of relapse: