Striving for Perfection

In our minds, we all have an idea of what life is supposed to be like. These ideals can extend into various aspects of our lives – from our relationships to our families, to our children, our work and more. Striving for perfection is a noble endeavor, but only if we are also able to understand and accept our limitations, which we all have; otherwise, we set ourselves up for constant disappointment. Life rarely goes according to plan, and those who expect things to be perfect are going to be regularly disappointed.

The same is true for substance abusers who enter recovery with high expectations of themselves; they develop an all-or-nothing approach to sobriety that sets them up for disappointment and threatens their chances for an enduring recovery.

When an individual is in the early months of addiction recovery, they often experience a kind of mental fuzziness. They may struggle to think clearly as their mind adjusts to life without substance abuse. This is also a time when their emotions are erratic. Those who fail to cope with these challenges in early recovery are more likely to relapse. Mindfulness meditation can be a great tool at all stages of sobriety. It gives people more control over their emotions and increases mental clarity.

What is Mindfulness Meditation?

Mindfulness meditation involves purposely paying attention to the present moment. It also involves being aware of thoughts, feelings, and emotions as they occur without being carried away by them. Mindfulness is a non-judgmental form of observation that involves three elements: awareness, attention and remembering. The individual needs to be aware of the object they wish to focus on. They then need to focus their attention on this object, and remember to keep it there.

If you’re a recovered alcoholic or substance abuser, you know that escaping your addiction through rehab and recovery gave you a second chance at life. It’s a cause for celebration, after struggling through addiction and completing a rehab program successfully. You deserve to be acknowledged for your success!

However, it’s also important to remember that there can be dangers associated with the good times, as well as the bad times. It is therefore vital that people in recovery learn to enjoy their success without putting their sobriety in danger.

How does one learn to be helpless?

Learned helplessness…sounds like an oxymoron, right?

The idea of ”learned helplessness” originated from experiments on animals. Researchers would put a hapless creature in a situation where they were faced with unpleasant stimuli from which they tried but could not escape. Eventually, they just accepted their situation and stopped trying to escape. Even when researchers added a means of escape, they would fail to make use of it. They had learned to be helpless.

The impact of addiction is felt well beyond the person struggling with the disease. Family, friends, co-workers, and even neighbors can be impacted by the many problems addiction brings.

Lies, violence, legal troubles and more bring hardships to those around you -- and many times those with loved ones abusing drugs or alcohol suffer a wide range of emotions. Feelings of guilt, anger and everything in between can be especially difficult for those closest to you -- such as parents, siblings, spouse or partner, and most of all, children. One family member addicted to alcohol and drugs means the whole family suffers.

You’ve done everything you can.  And, finally, you got the result you hoped for.  

Or so you thought.

Finally see a loved one make it to -- and through -- a rehab program can bring relief to many families.  But making it to rehab is not the end to the long road to addiction recovery.  Just the contrary, many times it is just the beginning.

What happens if it happens?

While rehab can lead to recovery, it is certainly not without struggle. Many recovered users experience a relapse during or after the addiction recovery process. That’s why it is important to understand that relapse is a process, not an event. In order to understand relapse prevention, you have to understand the stages of relapse. Relapse starts weeks or even months before the event of physical relapse.

Generally speaking, there are three stages of relapse:

It’s a long road back from addiction. While recovery is different for every individual, one thing remains the same: all persons in recovery need the support of others. And these others need to be intimately familiar with what it means to be an addict. Recovering addicts can experience agonizing doubt, fear, cravings and rocky instability that frequently tag along in addiction recovery. This is especially true in early recovery, but the insecurity, sense of loss and being drawn back into the addiction can also drag on for much longer – even years. Peer recovery support services are critical in both helping to conquer addiction, and greatly reducing the chance of relapse.

Substance Abuse Disorder and Recovery.

Peer recovery support services are designed and delivered by people who have experienced both substance abuse disorder and recovery. They know what it’s like to be an addict, to struggle with the daily pressures and stress, to overcome the guilt, sadness, confusion, to try to find a job, rebuild careers, relationships, and self-esteem.

Tenth Step: We Continued

“We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, we promptly admitted it.”

“Ugh, I’m so tired of looking at myself! When do I get a break? How much longer do I have to do this stuff?” Since we’ve made it this far, it only makes sense to go a little further. Step Ten is when we practice the Spiritual Principle of Perseverance. We have to remember, Recovery is something we get to do. Not everyone gets this opportunity to learn about and practice Spiritual Principles while making mistakes along the way. We are freely given a new way to live by our forefathers, it is truly an honor and a privilege to be in Recovery. Working the Tenth Step is a huge part of continuing on our journey and persevering.

Okay, so you are considering entering a rehab treatment program. Have you considered what life after rehab is like? What happens when you leave the facility? Where and how does one begin a clean and sober life? What are the steps you can take now to start planning for long-term recovery?

Life after rehab needs to be carefully planned in order to support lasting recovery efforts. At the 12 Palms Recovery Center, we offer Individualized After Rehab Care Planning and work with our clients to develop a tailored plan of action that supports life after rehab. After Rehab Care Planning equips clients with the tools necessary to confidently re-enter society and gain a greater chance at long-term recovery.